with love than any of the trash I've been consuming in the sunny, homophobic,
racist and biggoted sea side town of Port Macquarie on the NSW mid north
coast!!!!! Toby's Estate coffee has made it all the way up here, the coffee at
the cafe that use it is pretty good, I can't remember the name cos THEY'RE NEVER
OPEN!!! So for all the good coffee (actually, the best coffee in town) they
certainly don't fit into the grand
daughter-hanging-out-with-unwell-grandmother-on-a-very-strict-routine, routine.
At times like these, we need: car parks available TICK, good coffee TICK, open
in the morning when I need them? NOTHING!!! For a town that surely sees its
share of metropolitan dwelling family members of expat-now-local retirees, Port
Macquarie really needs to pick up its act!
Last sunday night, after a long shift with Grandmother chick and Big Bro, I was
starving... Big Bro had promised a home cooked Ozi fave - lovely lamb chops,
eggs, and tomato sauce (and a few leaves of iceberg - if i was lucky -with lime
juice - Port Woolies was out of lemons!!! - and some salt that I'd nicked from
Maccas)...But we were knackered, so Big Bro offered to shout me take away! The
chops had to wait. Big Bro was happy with Kentucky Fried, but I had a hankering
for a steak sandwich with egg, MMMMmmmm mmmm just how I like it. Anyway, with my
hunger steaming out of my ears, and twirling like chickwithguts when she's
hungry, i sadly found that the local buger and kebab joint had their hot plate
off! AAAAAARRRRgggghhh! So I had some of Big Bro's hot chips and some KFC
chicken (only the skin!). Some things just don't change, 11 secret herbs and
spices? BIG FAT TICK!!!
I had an average coffee yesterday morning at the Toby's Estate joints neighbour
(PIER). I don't think it was my heart break at the Toby's Estate joint being
shut which made the coffee average, but it could have been :( I think it would
be difficult in this town for a nightclub that masquerades as a cafe by day, to
serve a decent brew... Then today I went to the ex-Starbucks Crema cos Toby's
Estate joint WAS STILL SHUT!!!! The coffee was better than PIER but not as good
as Never Open (Toby's Estate joint). And even though the name had changed, I may
as well have been at Starbucks. Cuz chick had a long black there with me, and it
looked burnt :( And there's a weird phenomenon happening down here. It's the
mug option. Everywhere I turn, I'm offered the choice of a mug or a cup for my
coffee, I feel as though I'm back home in Wollongong!!! Maybe it's due to the
demographic? I dunno, but it drives me nuts!
There's another trend gaining speed here, every cafe seems to offer piccolo
lattes, Crema even offered them in two sizes - 1/4 cup and a 3/4 cup...Speaking
of piccolo lattes, on Friday and Saturday last week, I tried Buzz cafe opposite
the Port library for my hit, its just down the road from our quaint motel -
Ocean Breeze, lovely accomodating people, running self contained motel rooms
right by the beach. I had a piccolo latte that felt a little bigger than the
piccolo's I have at home. Anyway, even though they are locally brewed beans, and
a local franchise(I think they have four cafes round town) TICK, they made the
classic take away coffee mistake - coffee too hot! NO TICK! Grandmother chick
liked it, but she's been on this Port coffee roundabout with me, and prefers
Never Open the best! I'll try them again tomorrow...
Back to today. After the coffee, we went to the local italian restarant. I
needed a gin, I knew it was going to be average, so with averageness expected, I
ordered my G&T as I always do, tall glass, loads of ice and lemon, please. An
average G&T arrived, but it went straight to my legs, which was all I really
needed, so yeah, TICK-ISH. Cuz chick had a massive childhood obesity inducing
iced choc, god it looked good :) Oh, to drink my average gin, I had to order
some food, the staff were very cool, and a hazelnut shortbread seemed to be
foodstuff enough to qualify as a food stuff for their liquor license, and that
was actually quite yummy! It was unusual as it was hazelnut flavoured, and it
had a choc dipped bottom just like those fabulous biscuits from the Alawa cake
shop in Darwin! Yum!
p.s. Big Bro cooked up that chops and eggs feed for me last night, sans lettuce,
he couldn't get it together for the greenery, and I couldn't be bothered. Port
Coles for a good ol' Ozi feed? TICK!
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